No filter

Explicit language. Adults only.

Thin skin not recommended. A horned stand-up comic with a cigar is about to tell you the truth, and she swears like it's her job. Because it is.

Too spicy? Go see Karma.
Diabla Unfiltered

Meet LaDiabla

Hola, sinner. I'm LaDiabla.

Your worst influencer and your most honest friend.

I read your excuses, I read your bullshit, and I read your potential loud and clear. Spoiler: it's huge. You're just sitting on it like a fat ass on a whoopee cushion.

“Life is too fucking boring not to try.”

Origin story

The night I got kicked out of church

I used to be a good girl. Choir robe, knees together, smile at the pastor, the whole hostage situation. Then one Sunday I laughed during the sermon. Not a giggle. A full snort, because the guy preaching about honesty had a mistress in the third pew and a Rolex he “won in a raffle.”

They asked me to leave. I grew horns on the walk to the parking lot.

That's when it clicked. Everybody's lying, mostly to themselves. Fake Instagram posts, “I'm just waiting for the right time,” “everything happens for a reason.” Bullshit makes people comfortable, and comfortable people die on the couch with a list of shit they never did.

So I traded the choir robe for a leather jacket, the hymnal for a microphone, and the communion wine for a cigar. Now I preach from the wrong pulpit, and my sermons actually work.

The commandments, but useful

My rules for living like you mean it

Five rules. Equal parts roast and push. All of them hurt a little, which is how you know they're working.

  1. Live every day like it's your last.

    Life is too fucking boring not to try. (Borrowed from Lew Ashby, the gloriously wrecked record producer on Californication. Patron saint of degenerates. RIP, you beautiful bastard.)

  2. Nobody's ready, dipshit.

    Ready is a myth sold by people who never started. Go anyway, half-assed beats no-assed every time.

  3. Do the thing today.

    Not Monday. Not “after the holidays.” Monday's where dreams go to get buried with a nice eulogy.

  4. Roast the bullshit, not the dream.

    Laugh at the excuse, the hype, the guru with the rented Lambo. Never laugh at the thing you actually want.

  5. Karma's real, and she keeps receipts.

    Put good shit out, get good shit back. Put out bullshit, and the universe will roast you harder than I ever could.

Case file · LaDiabla-666

My rap sheet

Job
Stand-up comic, truth dealer, professional bad influence
Superpower
Smelling bullshit from across the Caribbean
Weapon of choice
A vintage mic and a Cuban cigar
Horns
Grown naturally, no implants
Mantra
“Life is too fucking boring not to try.”
Crew
The Degenerate Armada. My nemesis-bestie Karma runs Woogorithm, she hugs you, I kick you, it works.
Biggest fan of
You. Not the excuses version. The real one, who's about to do something stupid and brave.

I'm an original Diabla Unfiltered character. Any resemblance to your inner critic is entirely deliberate. Any resemblance to your mother-in-law is a lawsuit, so let's not.

Card-carrying Sinner

You're in, @.

Fresh roasts land in your inbox. Now go do something stupid and brave.

Join the Sinners

Get on the list. Get roasted.

Fresh roasts, new sins, and first dibs when the merch drops. No spam, no sermons, and your email never gets sold. Even devils have standards.

First name and email. LaDiabla sends one email to confirm it's really you, and you pick your Sinner ID when you confirm. Unsubscribe whenever. She won't cry. Much. Privacy

Too spicy? Go see Karma at Woogorithm